Lifelong habits

Habits built over a lifetime are difficult to change. 

They tend to "rage against the dying of the light". 

Bad habits beg and plead to stay. 

They gnaw at you, like a beaver building a dam or termites munching on a house.

This morning I was in Wawa, a local convenience store chain, trying to make choices for breakfast that weren't driven by cravings or desire.

That's what it seems to come down to, making good choices.

I chose a Chef Salad, a couple oranges, a couple bananas.

I noted all the things I would have grabbed as well.

Tastykake pies and cakes, bags of potato chips, candy bars of various kinds.

It occurred to me, in the past, when I would try to change what I eat; I would mourn the loss of these foods.

I would become greatly depressed at the inability to consume these foods on a regular basis.

I would jokingly say, "It's a drug, I'm addicted" when the longing became too much to bear.

I would happily jump back into the land of sugar and fat. 

It's no longer an option.